"Waiting"

Sandee on my adoption board posted this article about "the wait" that happens in life. I loved this article and need to re-read it every day.


Introduction (from "You're Late Again, Lord!" by Karon Phillips
Goodman.

"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I do hope."
Psalm 130:5

I have to be, without a doubt, one of the most impatient people our
Lord ever put on this earth. Perhaps you're a close second, or
Heaven forbid, even worse. We live, therefore we wait. It seems
endless. Forever we wait on something to happen in our lives--to get
a job or to get a promotion, to quit a job or to move, to sell a
house or to buy a house, to save money or to have children, to start
school or to finish school, to get through a difficult time or to
overcome a hurt--it's always something. Whoever said "life is short"
must never have known the frustration of waiting forever on
something tht never seems to come.

Sometimes, our days feel like one long checkout line: constantly
waiting, barely inching forward, unable to see the obstacles,
doubtful of a satisfactory outcome in this lifetime. And then what
we're waiting comes or doesn't, we adjust, recover and move on. But
are we any better for the wait? Did we find the purpose the Lord had
tucked so carefully inside. Did we listen to God and learn, or did
we just complain about the circumstances?

Either way, when the wait is over, we shift our focus to a new wait,
and the feelings are all very familiar. Again, we grow impatient.
The cycle never ends. Through all the delays that we misunderstand,
we never seem to get very far from where we started. We stand still
on the path that matters most. The waiting is nothing more than a
time of frustration. We argue with our Lord over His timing and fail
to see that every day is a chance full of purpose--even if we're
waiting. Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's
purpose that prevails. (Proverbs 19:21)

Yet we resist, complain, and sometimes get quite angry. Desperate
for God's touch, we move farther from Him, when we should be moving
closer. Do you ever find yourself in that kind of cycle--angry,
frustrated, and anything but patient with God?

If you do, welcome to the club--the Impatient Women's Club. Our
numbers swell daily when we are forced to abandon our normal plan of
attack and wait on God. We have become so accustomed to ordering and
orchestrating and planning and scheduling that it is incredibly hard
to admit that not all is within our control. Many decisions every
day are ours to handle, and we get pretty good at taking care of
things. We believe we could carry on even better if God would only
cooperate. We demand the answers we need from Him and yet we hear no
response. We question and condemn the intolerable delays in the
events we need to happen in our lives and yet nothing changes.
Doesn't God know that we need those answers NOW??!

Yes, He knows, but thankfully, He's smarter than we are. Becaues He
knows how hard it is for us to wait, to abandon control and to trust
beyond ourselves. He has devised a plan just for us. The basis of
the plan appeared many years ago, but it applies so well today, to
you and me. God is so clever. Your waiting doesn't have to be
unproductive--He knows our workhorse hearts. He knows our need to do
WHILE we wait. So when your life is at a standstill over what you
can't control, and when you're waiting on answers that never seem to
come, God says to use that time to work where you are. God says to
learn the art of waiting purposefully. Maybe that's what God had in
mind all along. Maybe that's why we wait.

Our stubborn hearts resist the wait, yet there is no
need. "Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable,
always abounding in the work of the Lord, knoing that your labor is
not in vain in the Lord." (I corithians 15:58) We do steadfast and
immovable pretty well, don't you think? In this case, the
instruction is to "stand firm" and not be swayed from God's work.
The instruction is to follow God instead of trying so very hard to
hurry Him up.

When we ignore God's work for us , we misuse our valuable time and
yet can't understand why we have to wait over and over and over
again. You know the feeling. You see the waiting as an
inconvenience, but instead, it is a gift. there is no better time
than waiting time to learn how to become the disciple God needs and
the follower you want to be. Your work during that time is the
vehicle that will get you closer to God, if you let it. The Lord, in
His generosity and compassion, has already provided everything you
need. You can uncover the amzing blessings the waiting brings.

Beware though, because the plan God has provided takes work. It's no
quick fix. Waiting purposefully means working while you wait,
following God's word and surrendering to His will. It means focusing
on His view, not yours. It means coming face-to-face with God, in
all His glory and all your humility. It rarely means waiting for what
you THINK you're waiting for,but don't ever be afraid: the reward
is worth the work, and you don't have to wait (on the work). you can
start now.

PRAY FOR YOUR ENEMIES!!!!!!

OK, THE COOLEST THING EVER HAPPENED TODAY. I GOT A TICKET FOR A DEAD REGISTRATION TAG AND EXPIRED INSPECTION STICKER AROUND SIX MONTH'S AGO IN MORGANTOWN. THE TROOPER TOLD ME TO SEND IN PROOF OF MY REGISTRATION AND THEY WOULD DROP THE TICKET. I SENT IN PROOF AND CALLED A FEW DAYS LATER TO MAKE SURE EVERYTHING WAS OK AND THE MEAN LADY TOLD ME THE TICKET HAD BEEN DROPPED. SO A FEW DAYS AGO I GET A LETTER FROM THE DMV SAYING MY LICENSE WAS BEING SUSPENDED DUE TO A TICKET THAT HADN'T BEEN PAID. I THOUGHT THERE MUST BE SOME MISTAKE AND CALLED THE MAGISTRATE OFFICE. THE MEAN LADY WAS AS MEAN AS EVER. SHE SAID THEY TOLD ME THE TICKET HAD BEEN DROPPED BUT SHE SAID THE OTHER PORTION OF THE TICKET HAD NOT BEEN DROPPED. I DECIDED TO PRAY FOR HER THIS WEEK. THAT GOD WOULD BLESS HER. IT HAS BEEN REALLY HARD FOR ME TO PRAY FOR MEAN PEOPLE OR THOSE I DON'T LIKE, SO I HAVE REALLY BEEN WORKING ON THIS LATELY. I WENT TODAY TO PAY THE TICKET WHICH WAS 169 DOLLARS. WE DIDN'T HAVE THE MONEY BUT I WAS GOING TO SKIP A BILL TO PAY IT. I WALK IN AND THE LADY DISMISSES THE TICKET. WOW!!! PRAYER'S ARE REWARDED AND WE ARE SOOOOO BLESSED, SO PRAY THAT GOD SENDS BLESSINGS DOWN LIKE RAIN DROP'S ON YOUR ENEMIE'S, IT WILL CHANGE YOU.

ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY MORGAN WHO IS 14 AS OF YESTERDAY. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BABY. MANNING HAD HIS FIRST DAY OF PRE-SCHOOL YESTERDAY. WE TAPED THE WHOLE MORNING AND I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON GETTING IT LOADED FOR ABOUT 12 HOURS. I DID SUCCEED IN PUTTING TWO OF THE VIDEO'S ON YOUTUBE. JUST LOOK UNDER MANNING PRE-SCHOOL.

Revelation's and forgetfulness!!!!

Well, I have already screwed up my Monday fasting and praying. Not the praying part, just the fasting. I ate some chinese rice mix, totally forgot about the fasting I was supposed to start today, however I have prayed and worshiped today. So starting now, at 9am I will begin the fasting. Please join in this Monday fast and prayer for orphan's in the world. Carolyn, a lady that I totally admire is such a Godly woman. She has been doing the Monday fast and prayer for a while and invited everyone interested through her blog to join her. She was amazed at the overwhelming response. Her blog is listed in one of my favorites below. It is the stich that makes the sweater perfect.

I have been talking to Carolyn a lot lately, as my husband and I have been looking into adopting a HIV positive child. As medical professional's, it is not the medical part we are worried about, but the social stigma that will go along with it. I had pretty much thought that it probably wouldn't be a good choice for our family due to the social aspect's we would have to deal with. Again, putting ourselves first and ignoring the calling of God. I have been praying diligently for guidance from the Lord in this decision and without any answer, I decided not to move forward. That was until the sermon Pastor Keith delivered yesterday morning. I know it came from God and was directed to me. He talked about how we all pray that God will use us and ask Him to show us where he needs us. He pretended there were three groups around him. A group of orphan's, widows, and poor. He kept stepping over them as they were in his way as he was asking God to show him where he was needed. I cried during the entire sermon. I knew my answer had come. Pastor Keith also said we want to help and do God's work, but only when it fits in with our life, when it's convenient for us. He said oh! we want to adopt the healthy blue eyed, blonde child, but what about the sick orphan's, the disfigured orphan's? Now how is that for answered prayer's. So once again we are looking into the HIV adoption. I will add a post about HIV soon, to try to educate on this virus. I am actually shocked how little people know about this virus. My neighbor still thought it was possible to acquire it by kissing.

AND HERE ARE THE THREE BEAUTIFUL ALIEN'S THAT ARE FROM MY WOMB!

MY CRAZY LIFE

Ok, haven't posted in a while, I know! So much has been going on in my life and my little brain that I don't know where to even start, so I thought I would list some highlight's

* DECIDED TO PROBABLY TURN DOWN JOB WITH PEDIATRIC CARDIOLOGY-WOULD LOVE THIS JOB, HOWEVER THOSE DARN LITTLE PEOPLE MUST COME FIRST, AT LEAST THEY THINK SO ANYWAY. I WOULD BE WORKING FOUR 10 HOUR SHIFT'S AND THE DAY'S THAT MIKE WORK'S (HIS 12 HOUR SHIFT'S) DON'T KNOW HOW I WOULD GET THE KID'S HOME, WHO WOULD KEEP THEM AFTER SCHOOL, TAKE THEM TO PRACTICE, ETC.

* HAVE BEEN GETTING "THREE" CHILDREN READY FOR SCHOOL THIS YEAR WHICH IS A HUGE CHANGE FOR ME. MANNING WILL BE STARTING PRE-SCHOOL THIS WEEK. HE WILL GO FOUR DAY'S A WEEK, ALL DAY. I AM GIVING HIM ABOUT 2 1/2 WEEKS BEFORE GETTING KICKED OUT (MIKE THINK'S THAT ESTIMATION IS GENEROUS)

* MORGAN WILL START (GULP!!!) HIGH SCHOOL IN LESS THAN TWO DAYS!!! NEEDLESS TO SAY I AM A NERVOUS WRECK AND HAVE EXHAUSTED MYSELF FINANCIALLY FOR THE SUPER MODEL'S SCHOOL ATTIRE. HE IS SO DARN PICKY AND FASHION CONSCIOUS. HAS BEEN SINCE HE WAS OH! AROUND 2. HE REFUSED AT 2 YEAR'S OLD TO WEAR ANY TOMMY HILFIGER, ANYTHING WITH STRIPE'S, ANYTHING FROM THE GAP, AND ALL SHOE'S HAD TO BE NIKE. I DON'T KNOW WHERE HE COME'S FROM. AND TO HELP HIS EGO OUT, HE WAS VOTED AS "BEST DRESSED" LAST YEAR BY HIS 8TH GRADE CLASS. AND ON ANOTHER NOTE, HE IS SUCH A FLIRT. IT REALLY DRIVES ME CRAZY! HE HAS LOVED GIRL'S I THINK SINCE HE WAS TWO ALSO. THE NEIGHBOR HAS TWO TEENAGED DAUGHTER'S. HE FLIRTED FOREVER WITH THE YOUNGEST ONE AND NOW HAS BEEN FLIRTING WITH THE OLDER ONE. MAKE UP YOUR MIND SON!!!!

* AND ON THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE END OF THE SPECTRUM WOULD BE MY 11 YEAR OLD SON THAT IS STARTING MIDDLE SCHOOL THIS YEAR. YES, THE CHILD THAT LOVES ANYTHING WITH CAMMO PRINT. THE CHILD THAT IF I DIDN'T STEAL HIS UNDERWEAR OUT OF THE BATHROOM WHILE HE WAS SHOWERING WOULD CONTINUE TO WEAR THE SAME PAIR FOR AT LEAST TWO WEEKS OR MORE. THE CHILD THAT I REALIZED AT ONE POINT HAD WORN THE SAME PAIR OF SOCKS FOR SEVEN DAY'S STRAIGHT. THE CHILD THAT PREFERS WEARING THE PANTS HE FOUND AT A YARD SALE OVER ANYTHING NEW. THE CHILD THAT HAS BEEN LOOKING FOR THOSE PANTS FOR ABOUT A YEAR NOW THAT SOMEHOW MYSTERIOUSLY DISAPPEARED. THE CHILD THAT UNLESS MADE TO, WOULD NEVER SHOWER OR PUT ON DEODORANT. IN OTHER WORDS, THIS ONE IS GOING TO BE VOTED THE "STINKY KID". WHERE IN THE WORLD DID HE COME FROM?

* AND OH! YES, HOW COULD WE FORGET ABOUT THE FOUR YEAR OLD (THAT THINK'S HE'S 25 THANKS TO HAVING TWO OLDER BROTHER'S) THAT IS ABOUT TO PUT IN A ROOM WITH 20 OTHER FOUR YEAR OLD'S AND AT LEAST ONE ADULT THAT HE WILL THINK HE IS ON HER LEVEL. THE CHILD THAT ARGUE'S BIBLE STORIE'S WITH ME. THIS SWEET FOUR YEAR OLD IS ABOUT TO CHALLENGE THE MOST EXPERIENCED PRE-SCHOOL TEACHER AND I REALLY HOOPE SHE WIN'S. THE CHILD THAT WHILE IN A RESTROOM STALL WITH ME EXCLAIMED "YOU USE THAT THING TO PLUG UP YOUR BUHOLE" AS MY COLLEGE NURSING STUDENT'S WERE OUTSIDE LAUGHING THEIR HEAD'S OFF IS OFF TO THE REAL WORLD.

* AND MY FINAL THOUGHT ON THESE BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN IS "WHERE THE H^*& DID THEY COME FROM?"

Job interview today!

So, went for my interview today with Ped's Cardiology. The interview went really well. He is a little quirky, but seems OK. His PA that works for him now is awesome. I talked to her for a bit. She said he is a perfectionist. He only allows one anesthesiologist in his OR, no resident's, certain nurse's, and that's it. He really cares about his kid's so that is good. I would be working four 10 hour day's. They have already turned down two mid level practitoner's for this position, so I guess that is really good that I was offered the job. I don't know the pay yet. They are going to work up an offer and let me know. Hopefully, it's more than I'm making now.

It seem's like this should be a really easy decision, but it's not. I love working five minute's from home. Being there to pick up the kid's every day from school and having my summer off with the kid's. The only problem is that I don't make enough to pay all the bill's not to mention pay for college education or repay my loan's here soon.

So, I am going to spend the next few night's pretty much freaking out and trying to figure out what to do. I need to pray a lot and I really need a sign ( I usually require the big signs, like the one that hits you upside the head).

Any opinion's are not only welcome but wanted. If you could see me I would be down on my knee's literally begging for advice. C'mon people tell me what I should do!!!!!

Love this video to Chris Tomlin's song.