About Me (A Fun Post)

True or False
I never changed a diaper before my first child was born

True or False
I always knew I wanted to adopt but wasn't so sure about giving birth

True or False
I have three dogs, two cats, and a bird

True or False
I question my faith daily

True or False
I lean on my Savior every minute of the day\

True or False
My husband has tried to kill me in his sleep

True or False
Most days my animals are better behaved than my kids

True or False
My secret wish is to live in Africa as a long term missionary

True or False
I want to flash my girls one time at Mardi Gras

True or False
I once dreamed of becoming a FBI Agent

True or False
I once dreamed of becoming a marine biologist

True or False
I would commit bigemy if Denzel Washington proposed

True or False
I absolutely loved every minute of my childhood

True or False
I married my best friend and soul mate

True or False
I could live in the bush without any problems

True or False
I worry a lot

True or False
I would adopt 10 children if I had the money

True or False
I would adopt 15 children if I had the money

True or False
I dream of being a homeschooling/stay at home mama

True or False
I love my mommy more than anything in the world

True or False
I also lov my daddy lot's

True or False
I once fell from the top of a ladder in the middle of a dance routine at a high school football game

True or False
I recently let my child swim at a pool party for 10 minutes before I realized we were at the wrong party on the wrong day

True or False
I had nephrotic syndrome in highschool and spent a month in the hospital

True or False
I wake up 5 to 6 times a night to pee

True or False
When pregnant, I wake up 10-15 times a night to pee

True or False
I love my chocolate lab more than any of my other animals

True or False
I really want to be a sophisticated wine drinker, but I can't stand the taste of it

True or False
I once loudly exclaimed in the middle of a sports store "There are plenty of other Dick's around here!" as my eldest son begged for the very last catcher's mit in Dicks Sporting Goods.

True or False
My youngest colored our border collie with a blue sharpie while I fell asleep on the couch

True or False
I secretly dream of torturing the border collie on a regular basis

True or False
I dream of living on the beach

True or False
I am scared shitless to fly

True or False
I am rarely ever down

True or False
I am always in a good mood

True or False
I think I piss people off because I am always happy, like a big Lab running at you!

True or False
The nurses almost didn't let me bring the oldest home because it took me over an hour to dress him

True or False
I love pregnancy

True or False
I love my job

True or False
I would love to work for an adoption agency one day

True or False
I really like to say "told ya so" every time I tell the little one not to do something and he does and ends up somewhat injured

True or False
My relationship with the Lord gets stronger each and every day

True or False
I think about dying a lot the older I get

True or False
I am afraid of death

True or False
I love the smell of my husbands skin at the end of the day, especially around his temple area

True or False
I love to watch my boys smile

True or False
Can't wait to see my baby girl smile

True or False
Sometimes I feel closer to my adoption friends than my friends here

True or False
I can no longer rent movies in the US or Africa because of late fees

True or False
Thought I would be put in jail for not returning movies in Zambia on time

True or False
Thought my husband was going to kill me when someone called from Africa about movies being turned in

True or False
I didn't go back to a store after I realized they didn't charge me for an item once

True or False
I am a hippie at heart

True or False
I am a nerd

True or False
I can belch and fart right along with my boys

True or False
I want to be a congress woman one day

True or False
I want to change the world

True or False
I truly believe that one person can make a difference





Give up? They are all true. That was fun. Now how about you?

God at work

I just love to sit back and look at all the ways God is and continues to show His presence in my life. I reflect on a regular basis. I didn't use to reflect this often and realized I was missing out on an opportunity to piece things together and truly see where He is working throughout my life.

Another one of these opportunities came about recently. My cousin was visiting recently. She is a social worker down in the southern part of WV. I was telling her we had recently decided on an agency with which we would proceed with for foster care in our county. As I picked up the application, I thought to myself "I need to get busy and fill this out today." The Holy Spirit spoke and said "wait, just wait". I was like, "OK, God, whatever, I'll wait, just let me know." The next day we received an e-mail from our adoption agency saying they had a little girl for us that was 2.5 month's old. They knew we had decided not to continue with international adoption two month's ago. The lady said she really wanted to place a little one with my husband and I and that she was paper ready and could be filed for court immediately. Of course we said YES!!!!!

So now, I know why I was to wait. Obedience to God brings about many blessings. Obedience is something that I continue to work on daily in my walk with Christ. A relationship with Christ leads to knowing Christ which leads to recognizing God's voice, which ultimately leads to obedience. Only God knows what is in store for us with this new referral. Maybe this adoption will work out this time, maybe it won't. I will not question God's work, even if I don't understand it. My only work is to continue to be faithful and hang on for the ride!!

Where did he come from?

I am talking about Manning, my five year old, robust, loving, stubborn, outspoken, opinionated five year old. I must say he does get a lot of his traits honestly ( I won't say from which side of the family however). He is just never ending with his points of view. He cracks me up every day, actually throughout the day.

With the many snowstorms that have battered us in the north-east, Manning and I have spent now, 8 days together 24/7. There have been times I have wanted to kill him over the past week, but i am sure he would tell you the same about me.

First off, I should start by reminding everyone that Manning is the baby of three boys. My oldest is month's away from turning 16, and the other is almost 13. From day one, this child has been coddled and spoiled, not by us, his loving parents, but by his older brothers. They would let him get away with anything, he could do no wrong in their eyes. They yelled at anyone for disciplining him, even the babysitters. Nobody and I mean nobody messed with "their baby". I can tell you now that this loving relationship has become not so loving since the child has grown and now has opinions and thoughts of his own. He is just not so cute to them anymore, in fact he is very annoying, or so they tell me.

Why the background, you ask? Because I blame those two elder son's for creating the little five year old monster.

Last night as my husband, Manning and myself were driving home from the mall and we all were talking. Mike and I in front and Manning in the back in his car seat (yes, he is almost six and still in a carseat, I am a worrying mother that also happens to be a nurse married to a paramedic)I was talking about how I needed to finish up the laundry when we returned home from spending money we didn't have. Although I did purchase the avia fitness rocker tennies. I wore them for an hour and my butt looks like so hot!!!! NOT!!!! Anyway, Manning decided to put his two cents in on this conversation that went a little something like this;

Manning; Mom you do all the housework all the time, you do everything while dad just sits on his butt

Me; Wow Manning, I didn't know you made observations like this. What kinds of things does mommy do at home?

Mike; smirk

Manning; You cook, clean, do the dishes, sweep, do the laundry.........

Me; Daddy helps with the laundry sometimes.

Manning; Uh! NOT very often!!!!

Me; So what kind of duties do you think we should give daddy around the house

Manning; Everything (overexaggerated and with dramatization with the hands) he can do all the work while you sit on your butt and watch!!!!!

Mike; Not smirking anymore, more of a OMG where did this kid come from look

Me; Wow that is a great idea. How long do I get to sit on my butt?

Manning; Til I am grown up and gone

Mike and I; hysterically laughing

This conversation sooooo made up for all the times I wanted to kill him the past 8 days. I told Mike, "this kid is soooooo on my team and not yours" He loves, loves his mommy. And to top the night off, the final conversation in bed went something like this (yes, he sleeps in bed with us, right smack dab in the middle)

Me; Manning do you want to go to my meeting with me tomorrow or stay here with your brothers

Manning; I want to go with you, I don't care how early I have to get up, I am not staying with them!!!!!

Me; OK go to sleep, we have to get up early

Manning; continuing to blab on

Mike; Manning, go to sleep I have to get up early for work

Manning; Dad, you just have to go to work and save people's lives, MOM AND I HAVE A VERY IMPORTANT MEETING TO GO TO!!!!!!!!!

Oh how I love him.

Our Crazy Life..... and the story continues

So much happening lately, I'm not even sure where to begin. I was supposed to be going on an all expense paid trip to South Korea for two weeks at the end of the semester through the school of nursing, however, I have changed my mind and have decided not to go. The Dean, a few students, another professor and I were to go and check out a college that we are doing exchange students with. We were going to look at their health care system and basically sight see. I have made myself sick worrying about leaving the kids and of course falling out of the sky. I have prayed about it all week and feel good about my decision not to go. We leave for the beach a week after I would have returned and my crashing and dying may have ruined the family's vacation!!!!!!

On the adoption homefront, we have decided since we have already paid our agency five thousand dollars, we should probably stay with them even though they are BIG LOSERS!!!!!! Mihiret is not going to be adoptable. I was mad, hurt, angry, and everything else for a couple of weeks and didn't think I even wanted to try again ever. Well now that I have gotten back to myself, we are very excited to announce that we have lost our minds and decided to add another.....BOY to the family, yes this means we will have a total of four boys, five if you count Mike in my house.

I've had a few people tell me recently that we could write a book about our adventures in adoption over the past five years, I agree, and actually I could probably write many books. One alone just on our three weeks in Zambia. I have always wanted to write a book actually, and that is what I am going to be working on this summer. Exciting things!!!!!!!!

Not Looking Good in the adoption world for us!!!

We have received yet some more disheartening news today. I spoke with our agency owner and asked straight up if he ever thought Mihiret would be paper ready and make it home. He told me she has no paperwork at all done on her in country. He said he couldn't say if it would happen within the next 1 or even the next few years. He said even though he thought her parents were both dead that they had to find a next of kin. They don't even have the death certs, nothing!!!!

He said we could get in the back of the line and wait on another referral, but we couldn't continue to wait on Mihret and also another referral. Well, I didn't tell him but I had already decided that if Mihret doesn't make it home that we are finished with adoption all together. So we have decided to wait 18 month's until the new I-171H renewal I just received is no longer active. If she isn't home by then, we are no longer pursuing adoption at all.

We have lost 35, now 40 thousand dollars in failed adoptions and it's not fair to the children I have at home to continue financially and emotionally. Most of this money was in loan form that we continue to pay on. Money that could have been put away for college for my boys.

I am heartbroken, nauseated, and feel quite numb right now. Please pray for our family for healing and please pray for Mihiret, who will continue to sit in an orphanage with no family to call her own. She knows no different as she has been there since around 2 months of age, but it just isn't fair to these children.

The "Boss" Man has arrived!!!!!

Whoah! is all I can say about "Boss" our new puppy. I love him dearly already, but I think I was somewhat mislead by the breeder. But what can you expect when you buy a puppy over the phone and depend on the breeder to pick the right puppy for you. I had been looking for around six months for a border collie and couldn't find any even within driving distance. They all seem to be in the mid-west. Well, Boss is the biggest titty baby I have ever seen in my life. I have never met a pup (he is 12 weeks) so timid and afraid of everything. He has been home for a week now and is just starting to get off the couch for longer than two seconds. Any noise and he jumps, any sudden movement and he is spooked. I was having to carry him into the yard to use the bathroom because he was too afraid to even go outside. We are making progress, but it is slow, really slow. I was hoping to do agility and freestyle frisbee with him, but not sure he will ever get to that point. He is even afraid of toys or balls. Well, at least he's sweet, to humans anyway :(

All about perspective!!!!

Well, we received news last Friday that there were issues with paperwork for some families with our adoption agency. They were going to let us know by Monday who all was affected. I knew we would be one of those families and it was confirmed via an e-mail from an agency rep. on Sunday. I won't lie, at first I was angry, really angry, yeah, so angry I wanted to punch someone in the face, anyone at that point , even my husbands face was looking like a great target Sunday night (poor Mike). Mixed in with was anger was a lot of crying and grief.

But, of course the more I prayed and talked to God about it all, I knew everything would be OK. I have had a feeling that God was waiting for something to happen within our family specifically before Mihiret would come home. I talked to my pastors wife a couple of months ago and told her I felt like God was waiting on Mike. I told her I felt like God was working in him and that this work was important and needed to be finished before bringing one of His children into our family and home. Well, when I received the news about our paperwork, it somewhat confirmed what I had been feeling. I know the answers aren't clear now, but I know when our blessed little one arrives we will be able to look back and see the answers we so desperately want right now. I know for me, I am choosing to trust in the Lord. None of this is new or Surprises Him, he has had this planned since the beginning of time.

I have also thought about a little one, with a not so great immune system arriving in December, or January, or February and right in the middle of this H1N1 season. This delay may have saved her life. And to be honest, none of this is about us anyway, it's about the kids. Maybe there is work for them to do before coming to their families, maybe they're purpose has not been served where they are yet. We may never know and we can blame and blame and blame, but in the end it won't change what is supposed to be. When we have all the little ones home with us this will all be a distant memory. Please pray for all the families affected by this, that they would have patience and trust in the Lord during this trial. Please pray that the children will grow in faith while waiting and will be loved and cared for.